Mary’s Medicinals Muscle Freeze

Mary’s Medicinals Muscle Freeze

There are two kinds of pain relief products in this world.

The ones that gently help your sore muscles after yoga…

and the ones that make you temporarily forget you may have actually destroyed part of your body.

Mary’s Medicinals Muscle Freeze firmly lives in category two.

Let me explain.

Story one takes place on a cold Michigan night at the nuEra Cannabis Union City outdoor grow facility. The evening before a surprise inspection, I get the call: “Hey… they’re inspecting the outdoor farm tomorrow.”

Now normally that wouldn’t be a problem, except for one small detail. The massive view blocker on the fence, covering acres, had been left up all winter. I had previously suggested taking it down because, you know… wind and physics exist.

But apparently physics was not invited to that management meeting.

Sure enough, winter winds grabbed that thing like a sail and ripped sections of the fence down. So the night before inspection, guess who’s out there with nothing but car headlights, metal wire, and pure determination trying to make the fence look like a licensed professional installed it?

Me.

Halfway through the repair job the fence leans… my arm goes with it… and RIP, my tricep tears. I did finish the job though.

Enter Mary’s Medicinals Muscle Freeze.

I start slathering that stuff on like it’s holy water and my arm is possessed. The pain? Gone. Numb. Magical. I finish the job like nothing happened.

After a few days I had full use of my arm thanks to the miracle of topical cannabis science.

Then a few weeks later my elbow swelled up like a water balloon because the bursa expanded and I had to visit an orthopedic surgeon who drained it and filled my tricep with PRP injections.

Which brings us to story two.

After those shots my hip started acting up, so they ran X-rays. The doctor looks at the screen and casually asks:

“So… when did you fracture your hip?”

Apparently the correct answer was not:

“Oh, about a year ago when I slipped on ice after snowboarding, went airborne, landed directly on it, turned black and blue, and just used Mary’s Muscle Freeze until I could walk again.”

Turns out… you’re supposed to go to a doctor for things like that.

What I learned from these experiences is that Mary’s Medicinals Muscle Freeze works incredibly well. Possibly too well.

It numbs pain so effectively that you may temporarily forget your body is trying to inform you that something is very, very broken.

Which is both impressive and slightly dangerous.

So for performance alone, Mary’s gets 8 out of 10 fucks given.

🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

Because when a product works so well it convinces you a torn tricep and fractured hip are “walk it off” injuries… that’s both incredible pain relief and a questionable life decision waiting to happen.

Use responsibly.

And maybe still see a doctor.